Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

Relationships Deciphered

The purpose of this blog is to bring some clarity to the enigmatic nature of relationships through the in-depth examination of common relational impasses with the goal of increasing insight into our behavior and thought processes*.

In addition, this blog will discuss relevant topics in the field of psychotherapy in an attempt to educate and reduce stigma around mental health and psychotherapy in general.

*This blog is NOT focused solely on romantic relationships.

"Mask on, f*** it mask off!": Anger as a cover for depression.

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When I was in graduate school a professor described depression as anger turned inward. As I began to do therapy I found this to be true, especially of men. Through my continued growth as a therapist, and my development of my theoretical orientation (REBT), I've come to better understand negative emotions, their purpose, and how to assist clients with better understanding of their origin. 

That is, sometimes we are taught, as children, that some emotions are okay to show and not others. Think of a male child being told boys don't cry. This muting of the emotion sadness, can cause boys to try and figure out how to channel the feelings and emotions of sadness into a more "acceptable" emotion. A portion of my work, with all clients, not just men, focuses on: teaching clients the appropriate naming of emotions, helping them to be more comfortable with undoing some of the rules they have created around showing emotions, and assisting them with more appropriate representation of emotions.

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